Posts

Gila.

Kau tahu apa benda paling gila aku pernah buat?
Jatuh cinta.
Aku hilang kau.
Aku hilang seluruh jiwa aku.
Tak sangka aku mampu bagi seluruh jiwa dekat orang lain.
Sayang?
Rindu?
Kadang-kadang.
Entah.
Entah macam mana rasa cinta lepas kau takde.
Gila.
Memang gila.

Ed

In my early age of 20s, I was being told that my opinions dont matter when all i've ever wanted is just for my voice to be heard. I was being told that my presence doesnt make world a better place when all i've ever asked for is to be accepted as a normal human being. You see people. You dont need anyone's validation or approval to be who you are today. I've been trying so hard to please everyone but i ended up not liking myself. Your willingness to be seen or heard (so called vulnerability) is not one of your weaknesses.

Sembunyi

Menyembunyikan cinta yang jelas kau bisa nampak di raut wajah,
Tiap kali bertemu kami--
Itu adalah perkara paling sukar dalam hidup yang pernah aku lakukan.

-Ethimus-
4 Oktber 2017

Dalam.

Dalam gelap kamu suluh cahaya di mana sumbernya datang daripada serpihan diri kamu yang berkecai.
Dalam diam aku intai setiap peluang dan ruang yang ada bagi mendekatkan diri dalam keterpaksaan mengukir senyum ketika melihat kamu.
Dalam hati hanya pencipta sekalian alam yang tahu yang aku sering hadapkan ketika minda kusut dengan soalan.
Bermula sudah.
Akhirnya?
Tiada siapa yang tahu.
Kerana penyudahnya apa yang pasti;
Semua berbalik juga kepada DIA.

-Ethimus-
22 Sept 2017

Puisi

Image

Puuurrrfeckkkk

I never picture myself as a perfect human being.
Like not perfect at all.
Things that are easy for you guys, i find it hard for me to do.
In terms of everything.
Study-- social skills-- or whatever lah.
Tbh its kinda sad belonging to the minority.
The misfits.
But after all, I do believe we are all different in a way that makes us whole.
We complete each other.
If everyone is like me, who would help the imperfect human being like-- me?
Or the other way around.
So bersyukurlah.
Okey? :)

I miss him.

That person is sitting in front of you.
But you cant say anything.
Both of you guys just keep on staring at each other phone.
Scrolling the social media.
You both love each other but you dont know what to do.
You keep things inside.
When nothing feels right and nothing feels wrong too.
Ever felt so lonely and you miss someone but you cant say anything to that person? You keep everything inside you heart.
You start expecting things you really wanna do with that person.
You miss him.
But the only thing you can do is-- to include that person's name in your dua.
Because.
We both belong to same creator.
Allah :)